Sigh...

I am having a bad case of the mom guilt again. The past two nights Hadley and I have pretty much gotten home, had dinner, played for all of 20 minutes, took a bath and she was asleep, and yesterday she was super cranky from the moment I got her, so she needed to go to sleep as soon as possible. She was just not happy about anything…there were fits and writhing around on the ground- it wasn’t a pretty sight. I have started working out, because quite frankly I need to; for lots of reasons- 1. It might help with my blood pressure issues, 2. It is good to be physically fit, especially to keep up with Hadley, and 3. I am not feeling so great about my body lately and I need to do this to feel better about myself; I know that sounds shallow, but this is a whole new territory for me and I am just at a place where I feel like I need to this…so it means I get Hadley about 35-45 minutes later than I normally would ( I am leaving work 10-15 minutes earlier too), so our time together is getting cut short. I guess I feel even worse about this now, because we just had spring break and so much quality time, that I am starting to really miss it. Tonight I am not working out, but I have to go do some homebound teaching (because I could use the extra money) then we have to go to church…so we will be rushing around. Luckily, Hadley likes playing with her friends at school and loves her friends and teachers and church just as much. I don’t think I am trying to do too much, and I think I am pretty good at time management, I just feel guilty- this is the plague of all working moms I think. I have to take care of myself too though, to be the best mom I can be.

At least I am super fortunate to have a job in which I get lots of time off: spring break, summer, Christmas break… I just love this age so much, she is so much fun; she is trying to talk and really understands what I say to her and can actually be very helpful already. I don’t think this is a single mom issue, I think this is an every working mom issue. We wear lots of hats; it is a balancing act…